Excuses 101 (with apologies to Dr Seuss!)

I sit and stare and stare at the wall,
I have written,
Exactly,
Nothing at all!

My mind,
It is vacant,
The ideas,
They won't come.
I'm really afraid,
My brain has gone numb!

I stand up and walk
Around and around,
I notice a pencil
Down on the ground.

Over I bend,
And quick pick it up,
But look under there!
It's my pink cup!

Oh dear, oh dear,
Just look at the junk
That got shoved under here!

How long has it been
Since I've moved the couch?
I really hate housework,
I'm such a slouch...

Better get busy!
Who knows what I'll find?
A towel, a toothbrush
A shiny new dime!

WAIT A MINUTE!

I was writing,
(oh yeah)
Hey! An Idea!

I rush to the keyboard,
My fingers are flexed,
I take a deep breath
And write... and write...
Zip!
Aw shoot!
I think that I'm hexed.

I can hear the pie
Calling my name,
Why, if I eat it,
I'll be back in the game!

That was the last piece of pie,
My daughter will cry...

Unless...
Unless I bake sugar cookies!

That's what she'll want!
And while I'm at it,
I'll make a croissant.

NOW, back to the keyboard I go,
If I can just get,
All my ducks in a row!

I'll surf the net,
In its infinite strata,
I'm sure I will find
Lots of new data!

Did you know that hamsters could hold food equal to their body weight in their cheek
pouches? (gross!)

Did you know that the Purple Violet is the Illinois state flower?
Did you know that Madonna's first hit single was "Like A Virgin" way back in
1982?
(Where does time go?)
Did you know that J. K. Rowling (author of Harry Potter books) supports charities for
Multiple Sclerosis because her mother died of the disease at age 45?

Hold on...
I'm getting nowhere,
I keep chasing
A wild hare!

Once there was a little girl
Who had a little curl
Oh drat,
That's been done
I need an idea...
An original one!

Let's see...
A boy and his dog,
Find a hog...
No, that's dumb.

A girl and her friend
A girl and her friend...
A girl and her friend WHAT?

"Mom! Mom! Come quick! It's Vader and he's gonna tell Luke!"

Star Wars!
Now there's an idea,
Science Fiction is fun,
A girl named Mia,
A sleek white ship,
She's just starting out
On a lifetime trip.

I can't believe it!
Look at the time!
Now we'll have to stand in line.

My daughter's game won't take long,
Then pizza
And finally,
Family to bed,
And then,
I just KNOW,
Oodles of ideas will
Fill my head!

Quiet time alone,
That's what I need,
Oh look!
A new mystery to read!

I'll just read a chapter or two

I can't believe the butler did it!
How cliché is that?
I could write a better book
About mysterious Mr. Rat

Hey! Maybe I'll do just that!

Copyright © 2003 by Saundra Lee Woodworth