Craft of Writing

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Craft of Writing

Ann Armstrong

Setting the Stage in Fiction

Setting the scene in a movie is, by its very essence, visual. It can be done in the blink of an eye, a 10-second pan across a field of daisies. How can a writer of fiction accomplish the same thing without disrupting the story? Gone are the days when a reader will stay with an author through endless description. We cannot afford to lose our readers by giving blocks of description. That doesn’t mean that we are completely without our resources, however.

You can drop in a few lines of description, but every detail must count. Instead, try showing the scene through the characters’ eyes. Consider the following two paragraphs:

a. The house was run down, paint peeling off the walls. Weeds grew knee-high, except where a concrete path cut through them. A car sat on blocks in the driveway, an oil leak beneath it.

b. Amy surveyed Aunt Paige’s house with trepidation. The roof sagged, and it was only with great effort that she kept her shoulders straight and head held high. The driveway was taken up by a Mustang on blocks—Cousin Henry must be trying to save money again. By the oil slick underneath the car, he was failing miserably. Shaking her head, Amy started down the paved walkway that cut through knee-high weeds. Where were the flower boxes that she remembered? The cheerful yellow paint?

Which paragraph would keep you reading? While paragraph B is longer, the details are filtered carefully through a character’s eyes. Every detail counts, not only because the scene is being set, but also because Amy’s character and the story are developing. We know the players in the game: Amy, Aunt Paige and Henry, Amy's cousin. We also know that something has happened, something that is bringing both Amy and Aunt Paige’s house down. While paragraph A is shorter, it is as interesting as a shopping list.

Another way to set the stage in fiction is to intersperse bits of setting with action or dialogue. It is a quick and easy way to add details that you might not otherwise be able to include.

a. “I don’t know how that could have happened,” Caroline said as she carefully ran a dust rag across the already spotless antique buffet.

b. Grandma stirred a pot of noodles, leaned back and butt-bumped the drawer behind her closed.

In sentence A, we can gather a couple of things. Caroline might be a bit of a neat freak. That will depend on how the rest of the house looks. It also tells us that Caroline is used to having antiques and probably has other fine things in the house. In sentence B, we are told in a few short words that Grandma lives in cramped quarters. Not many houses have kitchens so small that you can butt-bump a drawer closed; we can surmise that she probably lives in an apartment.

No matter how you decide to describe the world that your characters live in, it must be done in a way that keeps the reader with you. Filtering it through a character’s eyes or dropping details into action and dialogue are a few ways to keep readers with you throughout the story.